I am honored to have been nominated by one of my favorite fellow bloggers for the Sunshine Blogger Award, Ramae of the famous incurableblessings.com. I thank you Ramae for this honor.
Ramae is an inspiration to me and, I am sure, many others. Although diagnosed with a rare incurable form of cancer, Ramae has seized the situation and made living her life her priority. It is something so many of us can learn from — especially yours truly. Ramae blogs about her experiences and it is a must read for everyone; her blog can — and should — be found at https://incurableblessings.com/
What is the Sunshine Blogger Award?
The Sunshine Blogger Award is an award of recognition to bloggers from fellow bloggers. It is a way to recognize those who are creative, positive and inspiring — people who spread sunshine to the blogging community.
I like to pen a new post on this blog at least once a week. I find that having cancer, even post-chemo
and while in remission, gives me more than enough material to write about. In fact, I wish that there were a whole lot
less to say about trying to survive with cancer. And although I had assumed – quite incorrectly
– that after I had completed chemo that I would be able to spend a great deal less
time thinking about all matters cancer related, this has not been the case in
the least. To the contrary, I believe
that I spend more time ruminating about cancer now than ever.
all of this dwelling on my incurable cancer precipitated the recent events – or,
to put it more accurately, the lack thereof.
For it has been a few weeks since last I wrote anything new for this
blog. Sure, during that span I posted
some writings that I had written for other purposes/websites/magazines, but
that strikes me as cheating a bit. I’m
just getting double the airtime without adding any new content. It’s like a re-run (which, for those born
after 1990 means a show that is being aired again because we had no DVRs to
record it and watch at our leisure). That
leaves me feeling a bit hackish and unimaginative. (That’s not to say I won’t do it again – I can
live with feeling a bit hackish and unimaginative from time to time.)
When I was first blindsided by my cancer diagnosis six years ago, I was, as cancer diagnoses go, fortunate. My beloved wife happens to herself be a doctor, and while she is not an oncologist she is of course generally much more knowledgeable about these types of matters than would be a lay person. I am also fortunate to still have both of my parents alive and well – if a bit nutty – to provide additional love and support. And, as hard to believe as this may seem, I am also blessed to have compassionate, loving and, not unimportantly, geographically-close in-laws who are extremely supportive.
As if all of that were not enough – and I say this knowing full well that so many people must face this awful disease with a fraction of the support, if any, that I have had – I also live in the New York City area. Although that is certainly a mixed blessing, it does put within a short train ride many of the world’s foremost experts on the cancer that my body elected, without my consent, to which to subject itself.
do not like to engage in controversy or divisiveness in this space. I want this blog to be a virtual place where
those concerned about cancer issues can come and hopefully get some much-needed
relief from the endless woes that the disease presents. Nonetheless, these are divisive times in
which we live, and I feel as though I can no longer be silent about the toxic rift
between groups in our society. Yes, I believe
that I must speak out about the diametrically opposed views – and inability to
listen – that exists between the two main divisions in our world. I speak, of course, of those with cancer and
those without. And given that a summer weekend is upon us – a time when our two
worlds will be likely forced to interact over barbeques, watermelon, cornhole
contests and other frivolities – I think that it is high time for me to address
the elephant in the room.
Those that follow this
blog know that this is not my first foray into trying to bring our two worlds
together. I have tried in previous blog
postings to gently suggest to our non-cancerous friends some of the things that
we find most vexing about their interactions with us. I have attempted, for example, to provide a
list of useful terms for the uninformed to employ when talking with those of us
with cancer (https://itsinmyblood.blog/2019/07/11/on-cancer-language/). Similarly, I wrote an entire post about
things that the unafflicted should most definitely not say to us (https://itsinmyblood.blog/2019/07/17/silence-is-golden/). Finally, I penned a piece about how, despite
their best intentions, we would really prefer it if those without cancer would
stop giving those of us with it unsolicited (and generally erroneous) advice (https://itsinmyblood.blog/2019/07/24/unsolicited-advice/).
Yet, sadly, all of these efforts have
failed to produce the hoped-for results as the gap between our two realities is
no more narrow now than before I undertook these Herculean efforts.